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your finger my trigger
2:52 p.m. 2004-03-08

"Burn up the pain... my thoughts are strange"

What would it take to relieve me of this, neverender? Who's to say that you're in the right here, stupid gurl? What's the explanation behind everyone's sudden lack of empathy or interest. "my dearest apollo...." i used to know what it was like to be so secure in everything that went on, used to understand it all as the world blew past on all sides. "my love is music" One thing left to hold onto, one thing that won't just let go, one thing that will never be unstable. "my life's a merry melody"

"If it was anything else i'd let it go, but music.... jesus..."

"you're leaving me in lue of this song..."

Fragments i know, somewhat disarranged and some of them so splintered and disjointed you'll never make sense of them. Maybe that's how i want it to be. see the gaps in the face you present in the broken mirror that shows your intent. No matter what happens i hope you know what i meant when i said that this was true. Remember what we said wouldn't happen? I feel it slipstream and quick on the edge of everything i say to anyone anymore. gasping for air on the sidewalk remembering the danger and perplexed by the very air you breath if you were a van i'd be covered in tire tracks

"And if its healthier to leave you be may a sickness come and set me free, kill me while i still believe..."

Turmoil at the center of the eye of the storm the only fury greater is something no one understands. Truth. Lies you create benefit only you as you swing away on your web of lies. Try to find something more than what you said this wasn't, but we both know you lied. Wish i could sing a song that meant something to you anymore bleed away from me


back & forth

words @ jake, layout @ kelly