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girl, i miss you
10:16 p.m. 2007-04-26

You lie there, like sun in your hair, or whimsy or dying and i scrap my knees on asphalt and gravel every time i try to reach you. And i can't tell the colors apart anymore, this weaving of sundrenched spectrums is mesmerizing and are you bleeding or crying rainbows? You just fucking lie there, like a lover in dreamy expectation, like sin, like some abandoned scrap-of-hope teenage loveletter and girl there are streaks of all of this ground and grained into my fingers. Oil and ink and blood, streetlamps and brakelights, fullmoons and bloodshot eyes and when i look down i see the trail that led to all of this and it just glimmers and shimmers and fucking ends. And i don' know why you lie the way you do and i don't know if its the poise of your body or the curve of my cornea that makes this stuttering sweating perception so difficult to grasp. You lie like beaches and waterfalls and i stumble up footpaths and highways trying to make sense of this. Did you know i almost went back to those four walls tonight, thinking just home? And i was expecting to see you lying there. But I remembered that's not home anymore, and even if i had you wouldn't have been lying like longdistance phonecalls or latenight confessionals. I just wish the lights and the blur would fuck off long enough for me to see you for real

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words @ jake, layout @ kelly